Thursday, March 11, 2010

Every time i sit down to write a new post

i give a thought about it, but as soon as i begin writing it all vanishes, it makes me feel sick.
there have been too many why's in my posts, still i cant get enough of them.

why cant i write out my heart
write out everything that i have ever felt
every cry
every laugh
every drive on a lonely road
every feeling of being wanted
every wish that took my sleep
every person that i've ever met
every fondness that i've ever felt
every touch that gave me chills
every hour that took days to complete
every hand that i could not hold
every breath that wasn't complete
every time that i couldn't help
every person that made me cry
every person that didn't even try
wish i could do all of these

Thursday, March 4, 2010


why is it always so tough to tell what i feel

why can't i open up knowing that there is no one that can come and harm me
why can't i be demanding
why can't i shout aloud and ask for what i want
why can't i seclude my self when i want to
why can't i be resilient
why can't i understand
why can't i be rude
why can't i be selfish
why can't i say no

there is so much to ask, and so much to know
why don't people bother to know what is the reason
reason for being so sedate
reason for staying quiet
reason for not demanding needs
reason for being silent

there are many things i don't understand in life, and i don't take pride in this "not-knowing"
it makes me think, how people can behave in ways that they normally would never want to.
they don't bother thinking for a second, they don't bother caring.

i dont know if i am making sense.
i dont know if i can ever.

Sunday, February 28, 2010


its not the place you want to be.
its not the place you wanna come to.
its just a random waste of the e-worlds unlimited storage space that
many people love to spend without knowing what gives them the freedom to.
and who's behind it.
i'm one of them.

its hard to find a reason for not writing, its harder to find a reason to write
whatever it may be, i couldn't say no

its doesn't matter who reads it, or what they think
its just the way i want it to be,
just want these lines to remain in the world where things don't get lost
don't vanish away until forced to

i scribble here, no erasers, no pages i can tear
everything doesn't need to have a reason
it doesn't need to have a cause
shit happens
keep cleaning!!!